The Hidden Mental Mess Killing Your Joy
And How I Clear It in 3 Simple Steps
This article is part of the Becoming You track where we explore growing into the best version of yourself, because when you thrive, everything around you transforms.
If your brain feels like it's running 100 open tabs and you're about to throw the whole laptop out the window, I got you.
Here’s the 3-step mental clearing ritual I use weekly to go from “barely surviving” to showing up fully.
Includes my personal tool for rewiring mindset—available in Premium.
Setting the Stage
April’s Theme: Building Foundations
This month, we’re talking about what it takes to build strong family foundations.
And here’s the twist: it all starts with you.
Yup. Not the kids. Not the schedule. You.
Because as parents, we forget—we can’t pour from an empty cup.
We can’t give presence, patience, or purpose if we’re living in a mental tornado 24/7.
Today, we zoom in on one essential piece of that foundation: mental clarity.
When Your Mind Feels Like a Chaotic Overload
I woke up last Saturday with that all-too-familiar feeling.
Low battery. Like, 10% kind of low.
And not the kind of tired that sleep can fix.
It was mental exhaustion—the foggy kind where even picking cereal feels like a strategic negotiation with your willpower.
Notifications buzzing. Slack pinging. Dishes piled.
A to-do list whispering threats from the corner of the fridge.
I felt like I was drowning in invisible noise.
Ever felt that?
Yeah... you probably have.
And that feeling—it’s not weakness.
It’s a signal.
It means it’s time to make space—not just in your schedule, but in your head and heart.
The Invisible Clutter We Carry
We think of clutter as messy closets or dishes in the sink.
But mental clutter?
It’s sneakier.
More slippery.
It’s the:
Unfinished convos looping in your head
Mom/dad guilt that whispers, “You’re not doing enough”
Notifications pulling you in 20 directions
Internal scoreboard of all the things you should have done by now
It’s the emotional residue of everything we don’t process… but still carry.
And let’s be honest—if you're a parent, that clutter multiplies.
You’re managing not just your own life but the schedules, moods, and emotions of small humans.
And here’s the thing:
When our minds are full of noise, there’s no room for what actually matters.
So, What Happens When You Clear the Mental Junk?
Picture this:
You wake up with space to breathe, to think, to just be.
You’re able to enjoy your time with your kids instead of mentally multitasking grocery lists and project deadlines.
You feel present, not just productive.
That’s mental clarity.
It’s not perfection. It’s not some Zen monk idea.
It’s creating enough space to move through life with intention.
My 3-Step Mental Clearing Blueprint
Step 1: The Mental Dump (Declutter Your Brain)
Grab a notebook or open a blank doc.
Then do a full brain purge—dump everything on your mind.
No filtering.
No structure.
Just raw unloading.
Why it works:
Your brain treats every thought like an open browser tab. Writing it down closes the loop, releases the pressure.
Pro Tip: Use categories (Work, Family, Personal) or sort into “Urgent / Not Urgent” buckets to see what’s driving stress.
Step 2: The Prioritization Filter (Sort the Gold From the Noise)
Now look at your list and ask yourself:
Does this really need my energy?
Will this matter 30 days from now?
Is this aligned with my family values?
Color-code or symbol-tag the list:
🔵 Must-do | 🟢 Can-wait | 🔴 Total noise
Cross out anything unnecessary.
Circle your Top 3 Priorities for the week.
Suddenly, that huge mess becomes… manageable.
Step 3: The Reset Ritual (Clear the Energy)
Now it’s time to reset your space—and your nervous system.
Physically: Stretch. Walk. Dance. Just move.
Visually: Tidy a small space. Your desk. Your car. One drawer.
Mentally: Put your Top 3 priorities where you can see them daily.
Pro Tip: I made a “Reset Ritual” playlist with songs that snap me out of the fog. Same time. Same songs. My brain knows—we’re resetting.
Real Talk: Did This Fix Everything?
Nope.
But it shifted something.
I won’t pretend like this was a magic spell.
My house didn’t clean itself.
My inbox didn’t empty.
The kids still argued about who got the “bigger slice.”
But I felt different.
Lighter.
Clearer.
Like I had agency again.
And that’s everything.
Want to Go Deeper? Here’s What’s Inside Premium…
Inside Becoming Together Premium, I’m sharing:
My full Mental Clearing Toolkit
The exact journaling prompts I use to prep my day
My 5-minute affirmation practice pulled straight from my book—designed to declutter your mind and rewire limiting beliefs
Here’s the thing…
Mental clarity isn’t just about “clearing clutter.”
It’s about planting something better in its place.
And that’s what my affirmation practice is all about.
I created it as a way to mentally reset daily.
Now I’m sharing it with you.
Because sometimes the most powerful foundation we can build is in our minds.
Final Thoughts
Mental clarity is the beginning of everything else.
It’s how we show up with presence, power, and peace.
It’s how we lead our families, pursue our goals, and breathe again.
If you’re feeling mentally overloaded, take 10 minutes and try this.
And if you’re ready for the full reset?
👉🏽 Join Premium and let’s create space for what truly matters - starting with you.
See you next week,
Stella ✨
I can relate. Love the brain dump idea and I use it often. Sometimes you can't focus until you free write. The music is a great idea too. They say singing stimulates your vagus nerve which helps with resetting your nervous system too. Thanks for sharing.