5 Brutal Truths Keeping You from Success—And How to Fix Them

Hard to hear, impossible to ignore—these truths will change your life.

---

This article is part of the Becoming You track where we explore growing into the best version of yourself—because when you thrive, everything around you transforms.

---

Source: Canva

Ever feel like opportunities keep passing you by?

You see people around you getting ahead, landing dream jobs, starting businesses, making bold moves—while you’re stuck waiting for your moment.

Know this now.

There is no “right” moment.

No one is coming to hand you the life you want.

You either step up and claim it, or you watch from the sidelines.

If you’re tired of watching, this is for you.

These five brutal but game-changing truths will help you break through fear and start taking action—starting today.

1. Recognize Your Worth—Because No One Else Will Do It for You

🚫 Don’t do this: Wait for permission to go after what you want.
✅ Do this instead: Own your value and ask for what you deserve.

I used to think: If I work hard enough, someone will notice and reward me.

Reality check: That’s not how it works. Hard work is great, but it won’t get you far if you don’t demand what you’re worth.

🔹 Personal story: I talk to myself—a lot. When I wake up. In the bathroom. While driving alone. It’s a habit I’ve developed over time, and it’s one of the most powerful tools I have.

Why?

Because self-reflection tells you who you are.

I used to downplay my strengths.

I used to let doubt creep in. But the more I had these real, raw conversations with myself, the more I saw my worth clearly.

🔹 The truth: People will treat you based on the standard you set for yourself. If you keep shrinking, they’ll keep overlooking you.

📌 How to fix it:

• Stop downplaying your achievements—speak about them confidently.

• Set non-negotiable standards for what you accept (salary, respect, opportunities).

• If you want something, ask for it—a promotion, a partnership, a raise.

Your worth isn’t up for debate. Own it.

2. Step Out of Your Comfort Zone—Because Playing It Safe Keeps You Stuck

🚫 Don’t do this: Wait until you feel ready.
✅ Do this instead: Take messy action before you feel “qualified.”

I used to think: I need more experience before I can go after big opportunities.

Sound familiar?

You hold yourself back, waiting for the perfect moment—when you feel more confident, when you have more skills, when you’re “ready.”

🔹 Personal story: When you self-reflect, you’ll start to see the areas where you need to grow. But knowing isn’t enough. You have to act.

At some point, your strengths need to become valuable to others. And that process requires stepping out of your comfort zone.

For me, it started with small steps—sending that email, attending that networking event, pitching my ideas.

Then bigger ones—publishing a book, speaking in front of people, putting myself out there.

🔹 The truth: Confidence doesn’t come first—action does. You only feel ready after you’ve started.

📌 How to fix it:

• Say yes, then figure it out. If someone offers you an opportunity, take it—even if it scares you.

• Set fear-based goals (if it scares you a little, it’s probably the right move).

• Detach from the outcome. Focus on growth, not perfection.

Growth never happens in comfort zones. Step out.

3. Network Intentionally—Because Who You Know Matters More Than What You Know

🚫 Don’t do this: Collect contacts like Pokémon.
✅ Do this instead: Focus on real relationships, not random connections.

I used to think: Networking means selling yourself, and I hate selling.

The truth?

I was doing it wrong.

🔹 Personal story: I hated networking. The idea of selling “selling myself” made me cringe. It felt fake, forced, and honestly—exhausting.

Then, I flipped the script. Instead of focusing on selling, I focused on value.

I asked myself: How can I make myself so valuable that people WANT to connect with me?

That changed everything.

Instead of trying to meet everyone, I focused on building deep connections with a handful of people who mattered. And guess what? The opportunities started coming to me.

📌 How to fix it:

• Deliver insane value. Be so good they can’t ignore you.

• Engage before you ask. Provide insights, support, and real help.

• Follow up. Relationships grow when you nurture them.

People open doors for those they know and trust. Make sure they know you.

4. Set Clear Goals & Take Action—Because Wishing Won’t Change Your Life

🚫 Don’t do this: Keep saying “one day” without taking steps.
✅ Do this instead: Set specific, actionable goals and execute relentlessly.

I used to think: I’ll take action once I have everything figured out.

Let’s be real, this is why you’re stuck.

You keep waiting for the perfect plan, the right timing, the ideal opportunity—but nothing changes. Because nothing changes until you do.

🔹 The truth: Clarity comes from action, not overthinking. You don’t need more time—you need to start moving with what you have right now.

🔹 Personal story:
Years passed. Nothing changed. Because nothing changes until you do.

I had ideas, plans, dreams—but no execution. Then I changed my approach:
1️⃣ Set the goal.
2️⃣ Take the action.
3️⃣ Refine the process.
4️⃣ Repeat.

📌 How to fix it:

• Make your goals specific. Instead of “I want to start a business,” say “This month, I will research my business idea, write a one-page plan, and reach out to three potential mentors.”

• Break goals into action steps. Big goals can feel overwhelming—break them down into daily or weekly tasks you can actually execute.

• Track, refine, and repeat. Don’t just set goals—review them often, refine your approach, and keep taking action.

Small steps create momentum. Stop waiting—start moving.

5. Embrace Failure—Because It’s Your Greatest Teacher

🚫 Don’t do this: Avoid risks because you’re scared of failing.
✅ Do this instead: Fail fast, learn, and use it as fuel.

I used to think: If I fail, it means I’m not good enough.

What I was not seeing?

My conditioning made me think I was incapable, unworthy, or just not “meant” for success.

But that’s a lie. The most successful people fail more times than they succeed.

🔹 Personal story:
I fail daily. But here’s the thing—failure is useless if you don’t study it.

I analyze everything—with myself, with my children, in my work. I don’t just move on from failures; I extract the lesson and feed it into my process.

The real problem isn’t failing—it’s failing without reflection. If you don’t stop to analyze why something didn’t work, you’ll keep making the same mistakes.

📌 How to fix it:

• Reframe failure—it’s not a dead end, it’s data. Learn, adjust, keep moving.

• Fail forward. Instead of seeing failure as a stop sign, see it as a lesson.

• Watch the patterns. Track your failures and what they teach you. Over time, you’ll see patterns—and avoid repeating them.

If you’re not failing, you’re not playing big enough. 

You Deserve More—But You Have to Go Get It

Opportunities don’t wait for you. They go to the people who show up, speak up, and take action.

So, here’s the question:

What’s one action you’ll take today to move closer to your goals? Drop it in the comments.

No more waiting—it’s time to make it happen.

Stella ✨

---

Coming Soon: Becoming Together Premium!

Something exciting is on the way! 🎉

Becoming Together Premium is launching soon, and it’s designed to take everything you love about this newsletter to the next level—with hands-on learning tools, deep-dive growth strategies, and real implementation support for both you and your child.

What You Unlock With Premium:

✅ Instant Access to My Book Family Time Unplugged: Play, Connect, Explore with Chapter Reviews and Deep Dives: 📖
✅ Complete Playbooks & Learning Adventure Guides 🎒
✅ Printable Worksheets, Progress Trackers & Templates 📝
✅ Focus Challenges & Implementation Videos 🎯🎬
✅ Soft-Copy Access to My Upcoming Books 📚
✅ Private Community for Learning & Growth 👥
✅ Implementation Support via Chat 💬
✅ Monthly Live Workshops 🔴

✨ More action. More support. More transformation. ✨

We’re putting the final touches together, and I can’t wait for you to experience it!

💡 Want first access when we launch? Click below to stay updated!

---